Happy New Year!

And I'm back with an update!

2014 is pretty daunting since I'm gonna be taking my A levels this at the end of the year.

Not sure how I'm going to survive the year yet since I don't have motivation and self discipline most of the time... Let's reflect on 2013. Well, I guess 2013 was at least better than 2012 since I've started to actually adapted to the school (like finally) and have made great friends. Maybe they are not my closest friends, but they're pretty close. Well, one thing that I know I hated was falling out with my ex classmates. I guess we were never meant to be anything more than pure acquaintances, and I am really bad at conflict management so running away was what I did? Well considering they did ignore me comes to show that I'm not really worth it anyway. But let bygones be bygones and I choose to forget, I don't really know if I've actually forgiven? I guess forgetting seems way easier especially now that I won't be able to see them in school anymore.  Also, after a particular incident with a guy friend of mine, I kind of avoided him? Seems like 2013 is a year that I did a lot of avoiding? But thank goodness my classroom was secluded and I don't have to deal with seeing them too often. I think I was happier than I was in 2012. Things seem to be a little easier and less overwhelming. I guess the thing about my batch graduating is that I won't see them in school anymore? But they weren't the closest so I guess I wasn't all that sad about it. Sometimes I feel really selfish but I'm kinda glad the batch is gone. My current classmates were probably closer to some of their friends in the 2013 batch and I was jealous and envious that they got to spend time with and I'm just kind of wallowing in self pity because I don't have that? Its like sometimes they see someone they know and they can just stop and talk for a while, where I just stood awkwardly at the side not knowing what to do. I'm like the third wheel or something. Its awkward moments like that which makes me depressed coz' it seems like there's no one in the school that I am actually close to. It makes me seem really lonely. It's totally different from being alone. I can appreciate being alone and enjoying solitude but when I see my friends with company I just get jealous. Okay, maybe its enough of these like problems I had. Get on the good stuff! I manged to participate in my CCA's OCIP trip to Batam (which sounds really lame as compared to going to Philippines like we orginally planned) but nevertheless it's something. It was a really short trip though and I think even though I made acquaintances during this trip, it was not really impactful(?) but you get what I mean. In conclusion, 2013 was pretty okay I guess, but as compared to 2012, it was much better. Hopefully in 2014 it would be extra fine since I really need the luck and all. Before I end off I shall make a list of my resolutions for this year.

1) Eat healthier

2) Exercise every week

3) Do better in school

4) Spend less

5) Be nice

6) More disciplined

7) Smile more 

8) Be Happy!

Hopefully I would be able to stick to my new years resolution. Here's wishing you guys (whoever y'all are) a Happy New Year and remember to smile more! :D

full stop.